Fuck. How does that sound? How does that make you feel?  More important perhaps? More intelligent? I know that my own self-esteem gets a major boost when I receive email or read a usenet post peppered with “Fuck” and it’s derivatives. It makes me feel good to know that I don’t have to resort to it. I’m way more intelligent than that.

In and of itself, “fuck” isn’t such a bad word. It’s Old English, meaning “to plant.” So I suppose we had a lot of Old English farmers out fucking in their fields in the Springtime. In the popular vernacular, it refers to sexual intercourse. In general usage it’s used to insult, inflame, shock, and annoy people. I think that’s sad really. I like sexual intercourse, and our survival as a species depends upon it, and it’s older meaning as well. So why has it become so popular to use this word to insult others?

In a sense, in this essay I’m doing just that. I’m saying that people who use “fuck” in their day to day
communications are essential uneducated, unintelligent, illiterate Cretans. Human trash. The very lowest scum of the universe. It especially astonishes me when young people who should know better pepper their speech with it. Hardly a sentence rolls by without at least one instance of “fuck.”

A long time ago comedian George Carlin did a whole routine about the word. He imagined a movie script where the Sheriff was captured and the outlaws said something like: “We’re going to fuck you sheriff. We’re going to fuck you real slow.” In this instance Carlin was suggesting that we substitute the “fuck” for “kill.” The problem is that much of the time “fuck” is mean’t for “kill,” or at least intended for some method of hurting people.

I suggest that we start using the word in it’s true meaning. Let’s use it for sexual intercourse, for making love. “Fuck you” has a whole new meaning then. It becomes an invitation; a statement
of desire. “I really want to fuck you.” “Let’s fuck.” “Fuck me, fuck me faster! Yes! Yes!” “I feel so fucked now! Fuck me some more!” In other words, lets drop the negative usage, and only use the positive.

It could make the word a whole better place. Yes?

Fuck you. Because it feels so good to be fucked.